Comments about Life by 70's and older

"The happier ones divided time into (somewhat artificial) phases. 
They wrote things like: There were six crucial decisions in my life. 
Then they organized their lives around those pivot points. 
By seeing time as something divisible into chunks, they could more easily stop and self-appraise. 
They had more control over their fate."


"Beware rumination. 
There were many long, detailed essays by people who are experts at self-examination. 
They could finely calibrate each passing emotion. 
But these people often did not lead the happiest or most fulfilling lives. 
It’s not only that they were driven to introspection by bad events. 
Through self-obsession, they seemed to reinforce the very emotions, thoughts and habits they were trying to escape."


"You can’t control other people. 
David Leshan made an observationthat was echoed by many: “It took me twenty years of my fifty-year marriage to discover how unwise it was to attempt to remake my wife. ... 
I learned also that neither could I remake my friends or students.”


"On the other hand, some of the most inspiring stories were about stepparents who came into families and wisely bided their time, accepting slights and insults until they were gradually accepted by their new children."


"Lean toward risk. It’s trite, but apparently true. Many more seniors regret the risks they didn’t take than regret the ones they did."

"Measure people by their growth rate, not by their talents. The best essays were by people who made steady progress each decade. Regina Titus grew up shy and sheltered on Long Island. She took demeaning clerical jobs, working with people who treated her poorly. Her first husband died after six months of marriage and her second committed suicide."




Src: http://www.nytimes.com/2011/11/29/opinion/brooks-the-life-reports-ii.html?_r=1&nl=todaysheadlines&emc=tha212